I am so over her

My god y’all, we have so much to discuss. SO MUCH. It has been a crazy few weeks launching the Mother Load tour, but launched it now is, so I hope you will excuse the paucity of my recent postings. I promise to step it back up.

When we were last together, I was telling you that I am now, like, kind of friends with Gwyneth Paltrow.

But I am so completely over her you guys, ever since since she went on Oprah last month and said that her favorite kitchen timesaver, as a totally normal mom who cooks every night, was this Gaggenau steamer:

“It is the easiest thing ever! It makes the most gorgeous poached salmon with whatever fresh herbs you happen to have around!” she crowed. And I, imagining myself turning over a new leaf and serving things like poached salmon with herbs, providing it really was the “easiest thing ever,” made a mental note to Buy That Steamer.

The Oprah website didn’t have details, so I Googled “Gwyneth Oprah steamer,” whereupon I found out that it retails for EIGHTEEN HUNDRED DOLLARS.

Gwynie. I am only telling you this because we’re kind of friends a little bit. The next time you want to look like Josephine Six-Pack, check the price tag on the swag you got for free before you breezily suggest it as a must for every woman’s kitchen. I would not call myself a spendthrift, but my God, there are children in India without enough to eat. If there is really someone out there with $1800 to blow on a kitchen appliance, buy the Black and Decker steamer for $23.12, and give the other $1776.88 to charity. Or a failing Wall Street investment bank.

{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

Mollie October 12, 2008 at 3:05 am

Hee hee. Reading this made me think of you.

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Juggling Act October 14, 2008 at 8:43 pm

So, I’m guessing you don’t want to partake in my first blog giveaway- a chance to win a season’s pass from iTunes for her new series, Spain…On the Road Again?

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Whit.Veal October 15, 2008 at 2:00 am

Personally, if I had 1800 smackaroos lying around a steamer would be the last thing on my mind! How about ploppin that pile of change in a savings account so that when the economy goes down the drain you can at least buy ramen noodles to feed your kids for a year or two?

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Me plus 3 Hecks December 4, 2008 at 5:29 pm

I just found your post as I was searching for the name of Gwyneth’s steamer–and I feel EXACTLY the same way. She is so out of touch with reality.

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