Some things just can’t wait. These are the urgent questions my daughter has flung wide the shower door to ask me in the past week:
1) Can you live to be a million?
2) Is Fresca good for kids?
3) Is my doll’s name “Mih-kenna”? Or “Muh-kenna”?
4) What is the most far, California or the whole world?
5) Mommy, what are pussies?
3) Mih-kenna, but you can say Muh-kenna if you want to;
4) well, Maggie, it depends on– never mind. California. Now CLOSE THE DOOR;
Now, maybe my mind went to the gutter a little too quickly. But keep in mind that when my four-year-old daughter asked me that last question, I was naked. Also keep in mind that a preschooler can interrupt her mother in the shower pretty much every day and she will still stare at her mother’s pubic hair like she has never seen it before.
So in the context of the moment, let’s just say I was a little perturbed.
MOMMY: Maggie, what are– what?
MAGGIE: Pussies. What are they?
MOMMY: (drawing a blank, vamping desperately) What do you mean?
MAGGIE: (sighing heavily) Like pussy cats. What are they? Dogs?
Now I was really lost.
MOMMY: What do you mean? They’re cats.
MAGGIE: They’re pussies. So… are they dogs?
MOMMY: …You just said they were pussy cats.
MAGGIE: But they’re not cats if they’re pussy cats.
I have never had a conversation in which I was more at sea. Or wet, since the water was still running.
MOMMY: Close the door, Maggie. I’ll tell you when I get out.
I did not. By the time I rinsed out the conditioner Maggie had (much to my relief) gone back to playing with McKenna, which is what she does pretty much whenever I’m not in the shower. But I’m already dreading the question that awaits me tomorrow morning. I have a feeling we didn’t really settle the pussy cat issue.
What’s the most urgent question you’ve ever been asked while in the shower?